If you’re reading this blog post in bed, surrounded by tissues and half-drunk mugs of Lemsip, don’t despair. Here are five ways to beat the lurgy — and how to avoid it in the first place.
(1) Be careful who you date. If you’re already bed-bound, this advice may be too little too late. For future reference though, it’s always worth conducting a short (but thorough) interview before embarking on romantic escapades. History of glandular fever? Recurring cold sores? Dodgy tonsils? It’s all worth finding out. That way, you’ll ensure feelings of love-sickness remain purely metaphorical.
(2) Beware of mixing alcohol and flu medicine. Tempting as it is to wash down your Night Nurse with a healthy splash of gin, it’s rarely a good idea. Extraordinary as it seems, spirits don’t improve throbbing headaches and bleary-eyed exhaustion. Although alcohol may magically mask your symptoms, this is a temporary measure. Short term gain = long term pain.
(3) Register with a GP. This is not the most enjoyable of tasks. Who knew doctors’ surgeries were full of so many ill people eager to spread their germs? Once you’ve battled your way through the waiting room— otherwise known as the TB ward —, provided a seriously edited version of your drinking habits and have been publicly weighed in front of other registering students, you’ll probably feel like taking to your bed. But it’s worth doing this sooner rather than later. When you’ve got a temperature of 39 degrees and suspected tonsillitis, you’ll be grateful you have a doctor to write your prescription.
(4) Plan an escape route. When it comes to lecture halls and seminars, always ensure you can make a speedy exit. Nobody wants to be sitting in the middle of a row, going a steadily more violent shade of puce as they try not to cough up a lung. Frankly, this is a sensible policy to follow even when you’re not ill. You never know when you’ll need to make a quick getaway from an unusually mind-numbing lecture.
(5) Know that fizzy vitamins are your friend. You know the ones. The little capsules that go crazy when you put them in water, like bath bombs without the glitter. Although it’s unclear whether they will make any difference to your health, there’s always the placebo effect to fall back on. Plus, it’s easier to get your daily dose of Vitamin C from an effervescent tablet than from 54 mini satsumas.
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